Life?

Here is my interpretation of the phrase "same same but different" A love story of a German boy and a Cambodian girl. Same love, different... everything. His name, Ben Her name, SreyKeo Their love, no word can describe "I love you," said Ben "I love you too," said SreyKeo They do love each other, very very very much. She said "if you love me, marry me PLEASE, build me a house LATER, stay with me and my family FOREVER" He said "if you love me, understand me PLEASE, let's get marry LATER, we will be together FOREVER" Don't blame any of them. Both of them are not wrong but right in their own way. Sreykeo; that's how she was taught, that's how people tell her what Love means and that is how she imagines Love is. Ben; that's what he understands, that's how he sees Love and that's how he wants Love to be. They do love each other, believe me, they do. But their definition of love is so differe...

Does this mean hope makes you fly? is that good? what if you fly too high? According to the ancient Greek, "hope" was introduced by Pandora who opened her box and unleashes all the chaotic and darkness into the world and comes with it "H O P E" The little bring light that shrines inside all of this darkness Here is my story on having too much hope. Where my little light shines brighter than any darkness. You might think this is good, but no it's not. Going back to our question, what if you fly too high? you reach the sky? or fall back down and die. I can't tell you which one is the "right answer" because our hope is equipped with difference wings and feathers. I don't even know myself which kind of feathers my hope has. But I sure know it takes me high, too high where sometimes I think I will drop down and die. You see, I have high hope :D Again, no it's not a good thing. Because of my hopes, I sometimes ignore the ...

Here is something very personal. I'm single for a long time, I have one ex-boyfriend. We broke up on text, he just said "I can't take it no more" and left. I didn't know what's wrong with me. I blamed everything on him. Well, he is still shitty no doubt but at the time I told myself it was 100% his fault. Over time, History repeats itself I kept finding myself in the same situation where my anxiety get the best of me and ruin "us" You see, I have this friend, her name is Anxiety. She comes out every time I have a slight doubt about myself and she made it worse. Just simple things she makes it big, that's like her superpower. Credit; Singg "He left me on seen and he's probably busy but my friend anxiety says my boyfriend is ignoring me because I did something wrong" my friend anxiety got to me. When I think I did something wrong, I get panic "what did I do?" I'll start to apologize for what I di...

Don't you think so? I manage to find myself in weird places/situations in this world, can't quite put my finger on it. Just a few years ago, I am just a tourism student who thinks he's gonna work in a cafe till he finishes university then go back to the province to have his own business. You see that was my solid plan for my life, I assure that I figured it out. And now, somehow I'm an English teacher, doing social work, having my own project, joining other's people project, going to international workshops and other crazy unexpected things. Also definitely not going back to the province anytime soon. I thought I had a solid plan for my life but the world just changed all of that. Currently, I got zero plan but I think I'm gonna be okay I am kinda lost and just wondering around but at least I'm happy. Do what makes you happy Plan change, the world change, everything change. Even if you think you got everything figured out, the world will we...

I'm outside and extremely sick, being outside does not make it any better but still, I came out. Currently, I am in a cafe, my favorite cafe. My nose is running, I am coughing a lot and loud. People can notice that I am very sick, some of them might even be annoyed by my coughing sound. I am super cold but I am ignoring all of that by focusing more on this book I'm reading "The Sun is also a Star" and sipping my hot Jasmine tea - Favorite tea. I put my reading book down, took out my notebook and decided to write my mind out, You might be wondering, just like the people in the cafe with me right now "why are you here while you are extremely sick, just go home and rest" The fear of loneliness is far more scarier than me dying of a sickness I can't go home, I don't wanna go home. If I go there I will be alone in my room with my sickening mind. It's Scary to be alone with my head So I force my sickening self to be here, surrounded by...

I have issue eating outside in restaurant alone. it's weird I know. For the past years I rarely or almost NEVER go outside and eat alone, it's like a phobia. Why? I don't really know nor how I can explain what's in my head to you but here is how I feel; I feel scared, anxious, uncomfortable, nervous, and unease; of how people will think of me when I eat, how I eat, what I eat and why am I eating alone? You might think I eat like some monster or something but no, actually I eat in a very okay manner. But somehow my head still convinces me that I will/might do something wrong which make me don't wanna do it.  And it's not just eating out, also going to bars or going to party alone I CAN  NOT.  This isn't anti-social or nonsociable, I can talk to people and I go to events or social gathering alone is okay for me, but eating out NO It's complex and annoying. I remember the first time I went out to a restaurant and eat alone, li...